Shit.
Tomorrow is only Day Two. And I forgot I had plans to go out with friends. Now what.
I reaaaalllllyyyy don’t want to give them the whole “I quick drinking” speech this soon. I know I know I know, like two seconds ago I posted that I wasn’t going to lie anymore, but if I say something this soon, then I will feel peer pressure to just start another day. And that is ridiculous. I didnt decide on today being day one, it was decided for me. So today is DAY ONE, there will be no other day ones to come. I’d love to just go out for a little while and then take off, only I am driving really far to see them and I will have to stay the night, so that is even more pressure, great. Any ideas? How to I go about this? Tell them straight up and then go out for a sober night of watching them all drink? My boy will be watching me like a hawk anyways so that I don’t go into another drunken blackout rage, I don’t blame him, I don’t even trust myself yet, let alone think he would.
Why can’t I have any friends who don’t drink, or at least any who would even remotely understand my issues. No one understands! They just think I’m a nut, and I am, but I don’t want to be a drunk nut anymore, I just want to be a plain old sober nut.
Maybe I’ll play sick….just this once.
Day One 
Hey, I know how you feel!!! But you can do this! Just don’t go and don’t tell them. Don’t answer the phone. Or if you feel competed to tell them, say you’re sick, you got a fever and you don’t want to get sicker or get them sick. Remember the last night, it’s not worth it! I am rooting for you, sending many hugs! You can do this!